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Child Safety Tips:
Internet Molesters

Child safety on the Internet begins with your knowing the dangers and the safeguards.

An Ossining mother came home from work one day last month to discover that her kitchen screen had been cut and pots overturned. Nothing had been stolen, but another detail – a teddy bear had been rearranged in her 13-year-old daughter's bedroom while the girl was out of town – seemed even more peculiar. ... The mother's suspicions led to the arrest for rape and sodomy of a 20-year-old man who had formed an online relationship with the girl.
Excerpted from The New York Times – 05 September 2003

Online sex predators (of any age or sex) exploit kids’ natural sexual curiosity and gradually seduce them with affection and gifts – devoting great time, money, and energy. A US Department of Justice study found that 19 percent of children on the Internet were asked to discuss or engage in sexual activities. 15 percent were asked to talk on the phone or meet somewhere. One third of those contacts were made despite child safety filtering software.

Television reporter Kyra Phillips called the nation's largest database marketing firm, identified herself as "Richard Allen Davis" (then on trial for the kidnap and murder of 12-year-old Polly Klaas) and easily obtained the names, e-mail addresses and profiles of 5,000 Los Angeles-area children. It cost $277 cash on delivery; no questions asked.
Excerpted from The Marin Independent Journal (CA) – 28 November 2002

In an undercover sting, NBC's "Dateline" busted 19 pedophiles trying to meet and have sex with children they'd contacted online. Producers lured the men to prey on what they thought were children home alone in an upscale house which they'd equipped with hidden cameras. ... There were married men who looked like normal fathers, schoolteachers, a pediatrician, a surgeon, an Army intelligence officer, and even a rabbi. Earlier, a New York City cop who worked as a youth officer was caught trying to meet a child online for sex.
Excerpted from Investor's Business Daily – 17 November 2005

CHILD SAFETY TIPS: ONLINE WARNING SIGNS

• Your child quickly changes the screen on the monitor when you come into the room.
• You find pornography on your child's computer (maybe hidden on disks).
• Your child becomes withdrawn from the family.
• Your child receives phone calls (or mail) from anyone you don't know or is making calls to numbers you don't recognize. Either way, a sex offender can easily trace the child's home address.

IF YOU SUSPECT A SEX PREDATOR IS TARGETING YOUR CHILD

• Openly discuss your suspicions with your child – and the dangers of sex offenders.
• Review what is on your child's computer. If you don't know how, ask someone who does. Online sex offenders almost always meet potential victims via chat rooms then continue to communicate by e-mail.
• Use Caller ID to see who is calling your child. Contact your phone company to block your number from appearing on someone else's Caller ID (keeping your number anonymous), and block anonymous incoming calls.
• Call the police if your child has received pornography or has been sexually solicited.

IMPROVE ONLINE CHILD SAFETY:

• Keep the computer in a common room of the house, visible to others, not in your child's bedroom.
• Use parental controls provided by your service provider and/or blocking software, but don’t totally rely on them.
• You can take the power cord with you to work so your child can’t use the Internet unsupervised.
• Randomly check your child's online account and e-mail.
• Find out about the computer safeguards used by your child's school, library, and friends.

INSTRUCT YOUR CHILDREN ON CHILD SAFETY

• Be skeptical of whatever they are told online.
• Never meet face-to-face with someone they met online unless you go with your child to meet in a public place.
• Never send pictures (or web cam images) on the Internet (nor send a picture by U.S. mail) without your OK.
• Never give out identifying information such as name, address, telephone number, or school name.
• Never download pictures from an unknown source, it may well be pornography.
• Don't open a message from anyone they don't know.
• Never respond to suggestive, obscene, or harassing messages – and tell you about it (without fear of penalty).
• Don't say things online that you shouldn't say in real life.

The above lists were excerpted from the FBI library and the Center for Missing and Exploited Children. For more information on Internet child safety, contact www.netsmartz.org.

These filtering software programs help you with child safety: www.CyberSentinel.com and www.Cybersitter.com. However, even the best child filters allow one in five inappropriate sites to get through – and filters are powerless against chat rooms and e-mailing. Thus parental monitoring is still crucial.

Online code words that many children use to communicate with each other: A-S-L= Age, Sex, Location; CYBER= Internet Phone Sex; P911= Parents Are Coming; Watch What You Say; PIC= Picture; CTN= Can’t Talk Now; PAN= Parents Are Nearby; PAW= Parents Are Watching; POS= Parents Over Shoulder; NP= Nosy Parents; LMIRL= Let's Meet In Real Life. Excerpted from “The Parent’s Guide to Protecting Your Children in Cyberspace” by Parry Aftab

TeenAngels work to ensure the safety of kids on the Web and receive six weeks of specialized online safety instruction from the FBI, local law enforcement, librarians, educators and others. ... "These kids are Internet safety experts. We catch the newest trends on how predators are trying to lure them, said Parry Aftab, who started TeenAngels. It works because kids listen to other kids, Aftab said. "I've given up on parents. Parents just aren't doing it."
Excerpted from Reuters News Service – 09 September 2002

For child safety, read "Net-Mom's Internet Kids and Family Yellow Pages" by Jean Polly. Also see www.SafeKids.com and www.SafeTeens.com.

Police credit Celia McGinty, a 16-year-old Idaho girl, with speaking up and preventing a Michigan teenager from carrying out violent threats against his school. The girl met Andrew Osantowski, 17, online in a chatroom. ... She realized when the conversation turned bad, it was time to pass that information on. Police raided Osantowski's home and found guns, chemicals, bomb-making materials and Nazi paraphernalia. They arrested Osantowski, his father and Dominic Queentry.
Excerpted from The Detroit Free Press – 20 September 2004

Background Checks for child safety
Find out if someone was ever in a U.S. federal prison (assuming he’s using his real name) or a state prison for a sex crime at www.fbi.gov. Or see www.CriminalSearches.com website (no fee). It also shows a map with names of anyone arrested in a specific neighborhood, and sends you e-mail alerts when someone in your life is arrested or someone with a criminal record moves in nearby. ... However, the above sources are often incomplete, and there’s no way to distinguish between people with the same name if you don’t know their birthdays (and even that date is often missing). Nevertheless, you can always hire a private detective – a simple background check usually costs $50-100.

Personal Safety Devices

Child Alarms at www.guarddog.net alert you if your child wanders away beyond 30 feet. A variety of models are available. I highly recommend these if used with the utmost parental discretion.
Alarms (a.k.a. noisemakers). An attacker won’t likely chase a noisy target. See www.guarddog.net.
• For complete child safety, follow the guidance thoughout Crime-Safety-Security.com, especially Home Security.

Safety Tips for Kids

While teaching child safety and kidnap prevention to hundreds of kids over the years, I've gathered comprehensive child safety tips for stranger danger, child molesters, personal safety devices, and Internet safety tips for kids from the very best books, hotlines, training courses, and web sites. Find all of child safety here:

Child Safety - Overview
Stranger Danger vs Stranger Safety FAQ
911 Calls: how to do it right.
Child - Molester Safety: the subtle warning signs.
Child Safeguarding from molesters.
Child - Internet Safety: the dangers & safeguards. (YOU’RE NOW ON THIS PAGE)
Child - Outdoor Safety: staying out of harm’s way.
Child - Kidnapping Escape from a monster.
Free-Range Kids vs Myth Busters
Recap & Resources: a summary of this section.
Security Products - Personal Devices

Return to
Child Safety - Overview
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